Suzuki Burgman USA Forum banner

1 - 5 of 5 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,140 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
A man wakes up one morning in Alaska to find a bear on his roof.

So he looks in the yellow pages and sure enough, there's an ad for 'Bear
Removers.'

He calls the number, and the bear remover says he'll be over in
30 minutes. The bear remover arrives, and gets out of his van. He's got
a ladder, a baseball bat, a shotgun and a mean old pit bull.

'What are you going to do,' the homeowner asks?

'I'm going to put this ladder up against the roof, then I'm going to go
up there and knock the bear off the roof with this baseball bat. When
the bear falls off, the pit bull is trained to grab his testicles and
not let go. The bear will then be subdued enough for me to put him in
the cage in the back of the van.'

He hands the shotgun to the homeowner.

'What's the shotgun for?' asks the homeowner.

'If the bear knocks me off the roof, shoot the dog.'
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
1,327 Posts
I think I broke my rattle on the crib the first time I heard this -- told by a divorce lawyer from NYC who used to generate business by having affairs with married women!
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
826 Posts
I too heard that one a very long time ago. Think it was the 1960's. Back then it was a gorilla in a tree. The guy falls out of the tree screaming "SHOOT THE DOOOOG!" lol It's still funny.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,053 Posts
Hammer said:
I too heard that one a very long time ago. Think it was the 1960's. Back then it was a gorilla in a tree. The guy falls out of the tree screaming "SHOOT THE DOOOOG!" lol It's still funny.
Me too...Wambu the gorilla catcher. Ov extreme coincidence was that was about the same time I heard a version of "Wanna buy a toothbrush?" I remember telling the gorilla catcher joke to a fellow worker at a golf club plant (Ben Hogans). The version I knew was very long. We both operated loud machinery and every cycly or two I would step over to the other guy and tell a line or so. Took quite some time before I got to the punchline. He just stared at me like, "What??? What's so funny?" A while later we got our break and were both in the restroom. I asked if he could hear the punchline and he acknowledged he didn't hear it well. I repeated the one line and the guy was practically falling on the floor laughing.
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
826 Posts
I was just a kid up too late and eavesdropping on the folks with their friends. I was too late for the whole 'horny parrot ' story but I caught most of the gorilla story. Even so, my memory of it was sketchy enough that I could not repeat it. The punch line for some reason was etched into permanent memory. Thanks to SteveE I am going to tell that tomorrow at work. Good old stories never die...they just get new characters. :)
 
1 - 5 of 5 Posts
Top